Posted on by Dana Kane

Spanking PSA : Accountability

 

Since we know how much all spankos love school scenes, let’s handle this like an old-fashioned lesson. Fun, right?

 

(crickets)

 

Have a seat there at your desk, eyes forward, and try not to disturb your neighbors. Today, boys and girls, we’re going to talk about ‘Accountability’.

Accountability is a big word that means doing what you’re supposed to do. You can be accountable for all sorts of things, and even accountable to people or situations – it’s also a very important aspect of our social structure. Let’s start with the basics:

 

What is Accountability ?

 

ac·count·a·bil·i·ty
əˌkountəˈbilitē/
noun
  1. the fact or condition of being accountable; responsibility.
              “their lack of accountability has corroded public respect”
    synonyms : responsibility, liability, answerability

     

    See there? Right at the very top of the google search for ‘accountability’, the above. Lots of times a good way to figure out where a word belongs in the language is to look at it’s synonyms..you get an immediate feel for the strength and use of a word. In this case, the words synonymous with accountability are responsibility, liability, and answerability.

     

    How do we apply that to adult spanking as discipline? Simply put, when held accountable you are responsible, liable, and answerable for your behavior. When your behavior does not meet or exceed the expectations you’ve set for yourself (with the help of someone holding a paddle), the consequences will likely include a spanking. And almost as often they’ll be accompanied by a lot of listening, ‘yes, ma’am-ing’, and even the dreaded Written Assignment (or the even-more-fearsome Corner Time).

     

    Not a beating.
    Not an assault.
    Not abuse.

     

    In my opinion, adult spanking as discipline (or simply for fun, for that matter) is none of those things, and I think you’ll all agree. Even when we use the words ‘discipline’ and ‘punishment’, they’re used in the context of positive reinforcement, care, empathy, and mutually agreed-upon goals.

     

    Not everyone into spanking is interested in addressing their Issues. Hell, there may even be people walking around who have no Issues to address (although this is highly doubtful based on current empirical data)…and nothing works for everyone.

     

    But everyone is accountable.

     

    If you’re not living up to your own expectations  – because it’s truly counter-productive to care about the expectations of others before your own – maybe you need a spanking.

10 Replies to “Spanking PSA : Accountability”

    1. Laurel,

      It sounds like you need a spanking for motivation. If you’re not willing to come and get it, that’s the first place I’d start..

  3. I’ve been thinking about this. Not sure I fall easily into the need-spanking-for-real-discipline category.

    I love role-playing scenarios where I might receive a spanking for some naughty behavior I’ve constructed and acted out, or I’d want to relive a school memory from childhood. In those cases, it would be exciting for spanker and spankee to live in that moment as much as possible. (It’d work better if I imagined it as a real life punishment even if some of the roles were corny :) If the disciplinarian easily slipped into the part, it would almost become a real punishment, at least in the participants’ heads.

    In real life, I feel accountability for multiple things and I think spanking could help me achieve goals. But I think it would work best as a reward, rather than a real punishment. So, for example, I might have a goal (feel accountable to myself) to lose 30 lbs. I suspect I’d be much more successful in acheiving that goal if I received reward spankings every time I lost five lbs rather than being spanked in punishment each time I *failed* to lose five. (And one approach forces you along the path toward the goal and to a spanking…the other allows me to get the spankings *without* necessarily changing my behavior. In fact it’s key to not change behavior to continue getting the spankings!)

    What’s missing in the positive reinforcement approach, though, and I think it’s very important to some, is that I’m not being scolded or made to feel like a bad boy, or that I’m being punished for naughty behavior. When you have that kind of scolding/chastisement I think it allows you to cleanse yourself, reset the clock, drop any guilt and get going again. Some organized religions seem to provide those kind of mechansims and it seems very clever to me. I’m not sure how it ultimately works compared to punishment in acheiving goals…probably varies from one person to the next.

    I think I’ve heard people who administer positive reinforcement referred to as “life coaches” and so on. I do think there ought to be licensed life coaches/disciplinarians with skill/training requirements similar to other professionals. And they should be appreciated for what they do by more of the general public. And the real pros such as Dana would get even more respect for their talents.

  4. Accountability, see I can even spell it without spell check too. I know this word very well. Fortunately, I have a wonderful disciplinarian who sees to it that I am held accountable for not fulfilling goals I have set for myself or behaved badly behind the wheel when I feel like I have been wronged and want to punch someones lights out. There is nothing like driving timeouts to make me stop and think about how to behave before I leave the driveway. Oh, and the spanking I will get later on to see the light, and Dana gets her point across with each swat of whatever implement she happens to have in hand.

    1. Anna,
      You do very well at working toward your goals, and simply need occasional, somewhat stern reminders that you CAN do whatever you put your mind to.

      oxxo

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