I love the conversations that I have with other spankos, and the words that we use to express ourselves are so very important. This is just as true for spanking play as it is in every other aspect of life, and we set the tone and temperature of our interactions with the words that we choose to use.
Chapter Three: What’s in a Word?
We all have favorites; the ones that send the little shocks down our spines. One of the true joys of spanking a bountiful variety of playmates is the discovery of their ‘bottom code’ – the words, terms, and phrases that make the experience most genuine for them.
I know that many spankos don’t care for hefty language, cursing and yelling, and less-than-civilized behaviors while giving or receiving spankings. That being said, most all of us enjoy (or employ) verbal scolding, goading, correction, and embarrassment to some degree.
A few of the many words we use to describe the object of all this obsession/affection (and the ways in which I sometimes employ them):
Bottom – I use this one most commonly, as it has a nice, soft sound and is only a little embarrassing.
Example: “Bend over right now, mister. I’m going to give your bottom the spanking it needs.”
Tushy – The word is silly, and increases the embarrassment, especially during panty spankings.
Example: “My, my, my…your tushy looks almost as good as mine in those shiny red panties.”
Ass – Somewhat harsh, this one is usually reserved for ‘tough lady’ role-play.
Example: “If you’re man enough to show your ass in the boardroom, then you’re man enough to bare it in my office right now.”
Fanny – Another favorite, fanny is just embarrassing enough to be effective.
Example: “Go ahead and kick; I’ll stop spanking when your fanny is nice and red.”
Butt – Clinical, but good for real-life discipline issues and motivation.
Example: “You will receive ten swats with the wooden paddle every time I catch you looking at other women’s butts.”
Backside – Unsexy and hurried, I use this term when giving orders or making a point.
Example: “Turn around, palms against the wall, feet apart…and stick out that backside. This is going to sting.”
There are more, and I’d love reader’s input – which words and phrases ‘work for you’ and which ones make you cringe?
Is it all about the language, or does delivery make a difference for you?
– Dana
Other Conversations with Spankos:
Chapter One: Isolation
Chapter Two: The Bad Scene
DanaKaneSpanks@gmail.com
I find it most confusing/embarrassing when someone refers to my backside as being “naughty”. It’s typically not my ass that’s getting me into trouble.
Then of course any reference made to the childish behaviours for which I’m most likely being punished for.
~ olivia
I prefer the words bottom and butt. Of the two, I like butt the best. Ass is crude and some of the others such as tushy and fanny childish. That is my personal preference.
“Posterior” has its place when sounding lofty or sarcastic. “Quivering bare flanks” can be nice. “Belabored nates” is a bit of a stretch but could work in a real clinch. Exposed hams, of course… Nothing gets the message across like “50 strokes across the bare buttocks”…let me see… “Seat” is a bit mousy. Oh yeah, Heine and, of course, the lovely and talented “Keester”. All are different-colored threads to be woven together in the tapestry that is spanking.
“Bottom” is my choice, but Otto149’s comment had me laughing.
Probably hotter for me, though, is being made to say out loud what was going to happen to me (“you’re going to spank me”), and what *was* happening to me, and admitting that it hurt and squirming around pleading for it to stop (the opposite of what I’d want). And finding that my reasonable excuses wouldn’t be enough for my hot bottom to escape your hand: “But Ms. Kane, I was just cutting some paper with the scissors when Susy came over and stuck her pony tail right in front of me…what was I, ow, ow, supposed to, ow, wait a minute, do, please, OW,oh OW!” But I’d find role play more fun that a discipline session and OMMV.
Of course I think delivery makes a difference. It should seem authentic enough that I can fool myself that I couldn’t stop a session (while knowing deep down that I really could).
Anthony
First of all reading all of your phrases sends little shocks down to my… well, not my spine. I
Definitely like “bottom” the best, but disagree that it’s only a little embarrassing. Of all the words it has the strongest association with spanking, in my mind. Ass has been diluted by so many different meanings. (a piece of ass, acting like an ass, that tastes like ass, etc…) I haven’t heard anyone say “check out her bottom” in real life. To me, if you say bottom, you’re talking about a spanking. (and “bare bottom” is even better!)
Tushy and fanny don’t do as much for me, maybe because I haven’t heard them used as much.
Some words are so closely associated with a dialect that they can only be used by certain people. “Stick ya bum out a bit more.” can only be said with a British accent. Likewise “Yur about ta git them hams roasted” can only be said with a thick deep South accent.
Agree with Otto that Heiney (heine? Hiney? Hieney?) doesn’t get enough respect. Don’t know that I’ve ever seen it in print, and my computer has every version underlined in red. But I certainly remember “Get your heiney in the car!” growing up.
Rump? Caboose? Neither does much for me. However, the other glaring omission from those above is “buns” in my spanking lexicon.
Hi
“Sit-upon” and “rear end” don’t do it for me in spanking context and neither does “tail”.
“Behind” can work as in “…the cute, tight jean clad behind”
“Buns” on the other hand does it for me in spanko speak, as in “…she ran her hands over his red hot buns and told him to fetch the cane.”
Michael M
Words are extremely powerful. At one time, they didn’t effect me one iota. You could say anything to me and have very little effect on my psychological state. Nowadays, words are the trigger that make a spanking unbearable under certain circumstances.
It has reached the point where I can barely tolerate a Domme (especially my Mistress) using the word “spank” and any reference to me in the same sentence. I prefer terms such as “beat your ass,” as opposed to “spank your bottom” because the former harbors no remnants of humiliation and I can stoically endure because it has some kind of crude multipurpose maturity to it (which is why it is totally ineffective as punishment or anything else) – whereas the latter has me psychologically crippled before a finger is even laid on me.
Even Ms. Dana Kane, when so sweetly calling me over to position myself over her knee had me inwardly cringing with the words of instruction, “Now come on over my knee princess.”
What is equally as meaningful as words, is also the tone that is used. Had I been in trouble, rather than just being used in a scene for demonstration purposes, and had her tone been very stern and indicative of “I’ve had enough of this, you’re really going to get it now” – I wouldn’t have been able to get so far as to volunteer for a place over her lap.
And if it happened, it would be because physical force would need to be used to get me there. At that point, my at times ridiculously high pain tolerance would have evaporated and any references to my “bottom,” “fanny,” or “backside,” especially in conjunction with the word “red,” or “punish” would render me completely useless. Between those discomforting words and her remarkably heavy hand – I would either find myself very quickly in tears, or I would resist and fight- with the hope that she would give up and do something else.
I have been known to be so affected by over-the-knee spankings that I have managed to risk literally breaking my face to throw myself off a Dominant’s lap to preserve my dignity and “ass”.
Another interesting post – thank you, Dana. As someone who loves words I agree about favourite & non-favourite words.
Is bottom a soft word? To my mind the curt instruction to “bare your bottom” is clinical, efficient, scary and exciting. In truth, of all the possible words, ‘bottom’ can’t be beaten (and there’s a delightfully contradictory phrase!)
‘Tush’, ‘fanny’ and ‘hiney’ are very USA words that don’t work for a UK person like me; indeed, ‘fanny’ has a different meaning entirely in the UK.
In descriptive prose I love phrases like “a delectable derriere” (applied mostly to a woman) and “taut, firm buttocks” but these would sound strange in speech.
‘Bum’ is commonly used here, but to my mind it’s a more casual, friendly word that doesn’t fit well in a disciplinary context.
So I’ll stick with ‘bottom’ – especially if it’s having a stick applied to it!
UKL
Hi…
bottom, or arse and hide tends to get me shaking a little..
As in..
Get your arse in the corner, you disgusting child, pants and trousers down.. your bottom is going to feel like its been sunburnt in the desert after I’ve finished with your hide..
The rest can be used but those are the ones..
Stewart
When relating to spankings, my favorite is “bottom,” although I’m not entirely sure why. Any other word either sounds cutesy or crude.
Phrases that turn me to jelly like: “Bare your bottom and get over my lap,” or “To whom does your bottom belong?” would not have the same mental/emotional affect on me if a different word was used.
These are the kinds of conversations that I love! Thank you all for commenting and expanding the point – everyone is different, and that is exactly what makes us all so damned interesting.
Viva la spanko~
– Dana
Hi Dana, For me it’s hiney. ” If you want to act like a petulant child, MISTER, then I will treat you like a petulant child. Go to you room. I’m going to take down your pants and spank you on the bare hiney until I think you’ve learned a lesson. Now march.” JayJay