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Spanking PSA : Puritanical much, Dana Kane?

 

Readers,

Mind if I slide my soapbox out from under the sofa? It’ll only take a minute…

I know that there are as many kinds of fetishists as there are people and that variety speaks for a lot, but I seem to be experiencing an uptick in the number of Unacceptable Correspondences of late and have to comment on a few things which I believe all of us should already know.

*For the uninitiated, these are called Common Courtesies in my house (which includes my blog, my email, and anything else which I can selfishly call mine).

**I should also mention that many of these things MAY not get you into trouble with every disciplinarian, and I make no statement or judgment about other’s acceptable practices. What I WILL say is that you’re not likely to get yourself into trouble anywhere else, if you follow a few simple protocols.

 

How to Not Insult the Lady with the Paddle

Dana Kane Spanking Videos

1. Although it’s terribly difficult, try not to refer to your genitals in correspondence. Seriously, we all have them, so you’re not bestowing any groundbreaking information with Junk Talk – and trust me, we’ve all heard entirely too many genital details already. Be original and try sticking to things like thoughts, feelings, and ideas. Hey, maybe even spanking!

2. Same goes for filthy language. I don’t mean general use curse words here, but the ones you’d never say in front of your grandma. A good rule of thumb is that, if you wouldn’t say it at grandma’s 90th birthday party, then I probably don’t want to hear it either.

3. Sex. See #1. If I specifically ask about your sex life, sexual technique, or sex ninja exploits – well, you’ll be the first.

(Now’s a good time to say that I  a)talk about sex, b)have sex, and c)can be a downright bawdy gal under the right circumstances, so I’m not saying don’t BE who you are. Simply BE the you who has sense enough not to talk about that crap to me – especially if we don’t even know one another in Real Life.)

4. Play by the rules. This one’s specifically for those who exuberantly share/submit their spanking stories before ever having read the posting guidelines. Again, there is much information on the nature of my puritanical and iron-fisted demand for squeaky-cleanliness.

5. Don’t ask me to explain the rules of engagement to you; if you’ve reached the ripe old age of (fill in the blank) without the good sense to behave politely then I cannot help you.

6. If you’re lucky enough to get away with a “warning” about your behavior, heed it. Most don’t get a second, and nobody gets a third. You want discipline, buddy? Here ya go…discipline yourself right out the door.

7. Remember that your disciplinarian is not a prostitute, phone sex worker, sexual wellness counselor, or humping post. If your sexual needs are going unmet, it’s your responsibility to see to them. In other words, try to get laid someplace else, ’cause I’m just here for the spanking. Thanks.

8. The bottom line: As I spank my way around this country, yanking both men and women across my lap in what is always a private and intimate setting, I want to be just as comfortable and able-to-trust as you are in that moment. You can make that happen *just like that* by simply minding your manners.

Is that asking too much? Because, if it is, I’ll quote MY grandma:

“Don’t let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya.”

–  Dana

 

PS. I’ll add that you don’t want to become part of a pop culture cautionary tale, either..

My friend Erica Scott receives so much trollish email that she’s put it all together into a BOOK – called Correspondence Hall of Shame. She’s recorded hundreds (if not thousands) of rude, embarrassing, and unintelligible emails over the years. She’s also published a great many of the more remarkable ones publicly, along with her scathingly hilarious commentary. You don’t want to be one of THOSE people, do you?

 

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September Travel Advisory

 

** This is a Northeast Travel Advisory **

 

All resident spankos in these areas should take cover September 2014, because I am blowing through, paddles spinning:

 

New York City – Sept. 7 & 8

Albany – Sept. 10

Washington D.C. – Sept. 24

Toronto, Ontario – Sept. 26 & 27

 

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Video Q&A : Again

 

I think our first attempt at VQA did well, don’t you?

It went pretty darn long, as there were dozens of questions, and because I talked a lot (imagine that) – but I figure it’s up to you all to decide whether it’s worth doing again.

If you’ve still questions left over, or have come up with something else, ask your questions via the comment function below (please don’t email individual questions; it’s difficult to run them down in several places). And please remember, this isn’t an AMA – you cannot Ask Me Anything – but you’re welcome to ask questions about spanking, discipline, video, and stuff of general interest.

I’ll do my best to keep this one under half an hour, but no promises.

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A question for DanaKaneSpanks.com members..

 

For those of you who are current members, and even those who’ve been in the past, I’d like a little feedback. Heck, even if you’re not and have never been, feel free to weigh in on this subject :

Photo Sets.

I don’t currently have photosets to accompany individual spanking scenes on my member site. The truth is that it’s a terribly arduous and un-fun process to stop and take stills while filming, and the idea of staging the stills afterward seems weird to me – so I haven’t done them in the past.

I could, however, pull two or three dozen still frames from the HD video footage to construct still sets for each scene. This would be, truthfully, still somewhat of a pain in the backside, but if those of you who utilize the site, especially, feel like you’re missing something without the photosets, then I’ll consider adding them.

What say you spankos?

 

–  Dana

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Part Two of Amy’s excellent spanking story

 

Readers,

Recently, I introduced you to a new spanking writer named Amy Phillips. The first installation of Amy’s tale received an excellent reception, and she’s been kind enough to provide us with Part Two, which I think you’ll all enjoy just as much.

–  Dana

 

(Read  Part One here.)

___________________________

As Lena sat in Saturday detention, she thought back to the previous Monday when she had been punished in front of the senior class along with Jenny for their prank. After their paddlings, the two young women had been ordered to go sit in Miss Hafey’s office until she followed up with them. Lena had been terrified that she would spank them more. Lena was generally well-behaved—at least when she wasn’t being dragged into some crazy situation by Jenny. A private spanking or even just a stern talking to likely would have been sufficient punishment for her. Jenny on the other hand could be described as “incorrigible.” The public paddling, while severe, was appropriate where Jenny was concerned.

Flashback: In Miss Hafey’s Office After the Paddling

The girls had waited in Miss Hafey’s office for almost a half hour that Monday, worrying and pacing, until she finally arrived in her office to address them. As soon as she walked in the door, Lena burst into tears.

“We’re so sorry. Please don’t spank us again.” begged Lena.

Miss Hafey’s face softened. She felt bad for Lena. She knew Lena had learned her lesson and if she didn’t feel that it was unfair to punish the two girls differently, she wouldn’t have even assigned her detention for the upcoming Saturday.

“I’m not going to spank you again, girls.” Miss Hafey announced.

Both girls visibly breathed sighs of relief.

“I just want to discuss your behavior and today’s events. Sit down.” Miss Hafey said plainly.

“Um…” Jenny started while staring at the two wooden chairs in front of the girls. “Would it be okay if we stood?”

“Sit.” Miss Hafey commanded.

The girls hesitated for a moment, both surveying the chairs as if they could figure out a way to sit that would hurt less.

“Now.” Miss Hafey said, growing impatient.

The girls plopped down in their chairs immediately, visibly uncomfortable.

“What happened last night was inexcusable.” Miss Hafey began. “It was disrespectful, illegal, and dangerous. If the school wanted to press charges for breaking and entering, it could. If I wanted to press charges for theft, I could.”

“Is it really still theft if we just put the items on the roof?” Jenny inquired.

Miss Hafey shot her a look that could kill.

“Nevermind!” Jenny spat out.

“You could have fallen, your pulley could have snapped while you were using it and taken you with it. There’s so many things that could have gone wrong.” Miss Hafey lectured. “Lena, did you rig that lever and pulley system?”

“No, I did.” replied Jenny.

“Don’t you have a C in Physics?” asked Miss Hafey

“A C-..” Jenny stifled the urge to follow her response up with a sarcastic “thank you very much.”

“It really is a miracle that it didn’t break.” Miss Hafey stated.

“Hey!” protested Jenny. Jenny was half offended and half relieved that Miss Hafey was at least calm enough to be teasing her. Jenny took the older woman’s small quip as an opportunity to ask a question that had been on her mind.

“How did you catch us?” Jenny asked with genuine curiosity.

Miss Hafey pulled the pack of cigarettes Jenny had left on the roof out of her pocket, threw it down on her desk, and replied “smoking kills.”

“I take it I can’t have these back?” Jenny asked. Lena elbowed her in the stomach.

“No. You’re a non-smoker now.” responded Miss Hafey.

“So why was I the victim of this prank?” Miss Hafey enquired.

Lena gave an “I don’t know” type of shrug.

“Partially as revenge for all the times you’ve punished me, partially because I have a reputation to uphold, and partially because I thought deep down you might find it amusing.” Jenny answered honestly.

“Maybe in a few years.” Miss Hafey responded. “Certainly not today.”

“Are you still mad at us?” Lena asked. The poor girl’s cheeks had a mascara stream running down them and she had the most genuinely remorseful look on her face that Miss Hafey had seen in her 10 years of working with students.

“No, sweetheart. I’m not mad anymore.” replied Miss Hafey. She was stern, but not unreasonable. Lena clearly regretted her role in this prank and it would be cruel not to comfort her.

“You can go to class, Lena. I’ll see you Saturday and hopefully not before then.” Miss Hafey warned.

“Yes, ma’am.” Lena replied before rising from her chair.

“I’ll give you a note so you don’t get in trouble with your teacher for being late.” Miss Hafey said while scribbling some words down on a post-it note. She walked over to the punished young woman, handed her the note, gave her a hug, and then sent her on her way.

“You never hug me after I get in trouble!” Jenny protested.

“You never feel bad after you get in trouble.” Miss Hafey replied.

Jenny’s face turned red and she stared at the floor. “Touche” she thought.

“There’s 4 more days of school. Think there’s any chance we can go until Saturday without seeing each other?” Miss Hafey asked.

“What if I just want to stop in and say hi? Or if I need help with a final exam?” asked Jenny.

Miss Hafey smiled. “I should rephrase that question. Do you think there’s any chance you can go until Saturday without forcing me to reignite your poor backside?”

“Yes ma’am. I promise I’ll be good.” Jenny pledged.

“Good girl.” said Miss Hafey. “You can go now. If your teacher gives you a hard time over being late, tell them you were with me.”

“Hey, Miss Hafey?” inquired Jenny.

“Yes?”

“I’m really sorry about everything.” Jenny said, unable to look the older woman in the eye.

Miss Hafey’s heart just about melted. She wrapped the normally unruly girl in her arms and cherished the moment of sincere remorse.

Jenny lingered in Miss Hafey’s office doorway after their embrace, hesitant to leave.

“What’s wrong?” asked Miss Hafey.

“Nothing. Well kind of nothing.” replied Jenny. “I guess I’m just sort of sad about graduating. And I guess I might sort of miss being able to see you every day. And Lena. Mostly Lena.” Jenny said trying to cover up what she had just said.

Miss Hafey chuckled to herself. An hour ago she was handing out the most severe punishment of her career—short of an expulsion—and here the recipient was telling her she was going to miss her. What a strange 24 hours.

“Oh, this isn’t the last you’ll see of me. I fully expect you will keep me updated on how your grades are at community college. And if they’re not satisfactory, my fiance and I share an apartment with more than enough space to make my displeasure known. In fact, he’s heard all about you.” Miss Hafey said.

Jenny caught herself smiling and quickly feigned a frown. “Ugh, you’re the worst.” she whined.

“Aren’t I?” Miss Hafey asked.

Present Day: Saturday Detention

“Are you paying attention at all, Lena?” Miss Hafey scolded. Lena was snapped out of her reflection on the past Monday’s events and brought back to the present. Apparently while she had been mentally wandering, one of the other students in detention had landed themselves in hot water and Lena had been asked to fetch Miss Hafey’s paddle.

“Um, yes. Sorry.” mumbled Lena, reaching for the paddle hanging from the wall behind her and approaching Miss Hafey’s desk.

“How far along are you on your lines?” Miss Hafey asked.

Lena froze. Amidst her daydreaming, she hadn’t even heard Miss Hafey instruct the 9 students in detention to write “I will behave myself at all times.”

“Pretty far!” Lena lied.

“Show me.” Miss Hafey demanded.

“Okay, well actually I don’t have any written. I didn’t hear you tell us to start writing.” Lena explained.

“You know I don’t like lying.” Miss Hafey scolded. Disappointed and somewhat surprised that she was having to punish Lena again so soon after Monday’s events, she positioned Lena over her desk next to Tony, the boy she had asked Lena to fetch the paddle for in the first place. Tony was a tall young man. He stood just over 6’5 and despite the fact that Miss Hafey was just short of 6 foot herself, she felt a bit silly getting ready to paddle him. She didn’t let it stop her, however. Tony had been texting his girlfriend in the back row of detention when Miss Hafey caught him and ordered him to the front of the room. He was a good student and had never had a regular detention, let alone a Saturday detention up until this point. One of his friends from the basketball team was in danger of losing his scholarship and Tony allowed him to cheat off his final exam. As a result, both boys were spending this Saturday with Miss Hafey.

Miss Hafey didn’t want to be too harsh, so she gave the boy 3 swats with his pants fully intact. He had never been paddled before, but he remained quiet through his 3 mild licks of the paddle and then returned to his seat.

Miss Hafey then turned her attention to Lena. Lena knew better than to lie to her, so she lifted her skirt for her swats. Immediately after lifting the recently punished girl’s skirt, she realized that she was still slightly red and a little bruised from Monday’s paddling. Instead of giving Lena more swats for her first and hopefully only infraction this detention, Miss Hafey decided to be merciful. She sat down and pulled Lena over her lap for a hand spanking. Although Miss Hafey’s hand wasn’t exactly a walk in the park, it wasn’t as bad as the paddle and it wouldn’t cause any more bruising. She started briskly spanking Lena and the girl’s poor backside reignited into a ball of heat almost immediately. Miss Hafey spanked the young lady firmly and at a moderate tempo. Lena wiggled and during a particularly hard volley of swats, she threw her hand back to protect her bottom. This was a mistake. Miss Hafey held Lena’s hand so that she couldn’t put it in the way of the spanking again and tipped the errant young woman forward to expose the area where backside meets thigh.

“Please! I’m sorry! I’ll write extra lines, I’ll clap erasers, I’ll do anything!” Lena bargained.

Miss Hafey mentally laughed at the eraser remark since the school had only whiteboards in its classrooms. She continued spanking the sorry girl in order to assert that the spanking was over when she felt it was over—not when Lena wanted it to be over—and when she stopped she sent the young woman back to her seat.

Lena rushed back to her seat, embarrassed, and rubbed her backside on the way there.

“No rubbing, missy!” Miss Hafey chastised.

Lena’s face became a brighter shade of red as she replied “Yes, Miss Hafey.”

“I was lenient this time, but if you’re unable to finish your lines before the end of the day, you’ll be having another session with my cane, Miss Lena.”

“Ha, so by the end of the day you’ll have lines or you’ll get lines. Get it?” Jenny mused to her friend.

Lena was unamused. So was Miss Hafey.

“Jenny, you know there’s no talking or terrible wordplay in detention. Go stand in the corner.” Miss Hafey ordered.

“But that’s cruel and unusual PUN-ishment.” Jenny replied, stifling laughter. Some of the other students giggled.

“Jenny! Now!”

“You’re just mad because I’m CORNERing the market on-”

Miss Hafey interrupted but grabbing the giggling young woman by the ear and pulling her into the hallway.

“Jennifer, if you want the attention of the group, I can assure you that you will have it. It will not be the kind you’re interested in, however. We’re going to go back into that classroom and you are going to keep your little nose in that corner until I tell you to return to your seat, you are going to be silent and respectful, and you are going to write your lines like a good girl. If you don’t, I will see to it that you are very unhappy and very sorry.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good.” Miss Hafey said, guiding Jenny back into the detention classroom with a parting swat.

Jenny walked over the the corner and placed her nose in it as told.

“Lena, how are those lines coming?” Miss Hafey asked, stopping at her desk.

“Good, ma’am.”

Miss Hafey inspected them, patted the recently punished girl’s head, and smiled. “Good girl.” she rewarded, as she returned to her desk at the front of the room.

The room seemed to settle down, so Miss Hafey began reading a book she had brought with her. About an hour into reading, she received a call from her fiancé on her cell phone.

“I’ll be right back. I assume you can all behave like the adults that you are for 5 to 10 minutes.” she said, exiting the room.

The call was briefer than expected and upon returning to the room, Miss Hafey saw that Jenny and Blake, another frequent face in detention, were drawing a mural on one of the whiteboards. It appeared to be of a giant, building-sized Miss Hafey destroying a city.

“Seriously?” she inquired.

“We thought you’d like it. Also, we thought you’d be gone longer.” Jenny shrugged.

“It’s pretty good, though, right?” Blake asked. In all honesty, the resemblance to the actual Miss Hafey was rather impressive. Blake was a friend of Jenny’s as well as an excellent artist. He would be attending art school in New York in the fall. Jenny was largely unskilled as an artist, but the two shared a bond over a mutual love of weed.

“Bend over my desk. Right now.” Miss Hafey commanded.

The two troublemakers placed themselves over her desk as ordered. She took down Blake’s pants and lifted Jenny’s skirt. Jenny hated to admit it, but she was genuinely scared. She loved to push Miss Hafey, but she didn’t love the consequences. Her thoughts were interrupted by a sharp, focused pain across her backside.

Jenny gasped and cried out. She hadn’t expected Miss Hafey to return in time to catch them and she hadn’t expected her to use the cane. Her cries were followed by a muffled yelp from Blake. He kicked his legs back involuntarily.

“You’re not in detention to draw pictures, or be playful, or disrespect me. You’re in detention because you made a mistake and you have to atone for it. I warned you, Jenny. But you kept pushing and pushing and now you have to deal with the consequences.” she scolded as she landed a hard stroke on Jenny’s upper thigh.”

“I’m sorry!” Jenny cried as the stroke landed.

“Not yet.” Miss Hafey replied. “Blake, you can stay after detention for an extra hour to practice drawing on each whiteboard in this wing of the school and then scrub them until they’re pristine.”

“Yes ma’am!” Blake yelled out as his second stroke landed.

“Jenny, you can either stand in the corner for an extra hour after detention or help him. Your choice. One more each.” Miss Hafey informed them and then laid down two quick strokes in succession.

Both students rushed back to their seats.

“Which will it be, Jenny?” Miss Hafey asked.

“Helping Blake.” she replied, looking down at the floor.

“Helping Blake, what?” she asked, tipping Jenny’s chin upward so that their eyes met.

“…Helping Blake, ma’am.” she whispered.

“Good. The rest of you can go. Jenny and Blake, please stay seated.” She commanded.
_____
To Be Continued. Maybe! I’m not sure. Let’s see how I feel.

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Veggies, Critters, and Baking Near-Disaster News (TUS : Totally Unrelated to Spanking)

 

 

Legalized Catnip Club Opens in Las Vegas

Dana Kane Cats
Furry Rat Pack

 

All the coolest, cutest cats were sure to be seen at the opening of Krazy Kat Organic Catnip and Scratching Post Bar last night – sniffing, rolling, and cat-noodling well into the wee hours. Many cat selfies were taken before a fight broke out between two patrons during the house band’s intermission; witnesses report hearing no argument beforehand but say that the two patrons simply began swinging at one another. One witness said that the melee only lasted a few seconds and was quickly broken up by Krazy Kat security; no arrests were made.

 

 

A Tomato Grows in Vegas

Dana Kane Blog
This is not my arm. And I know that those aren’t tomatoes.

 

While I’ve found it impossible to grow much more than houseplants and sweet basil here in the desert, some folks have been doing it – fabulously well – for decades. Gilcrease Orchard is probably the best local example of desert farming and, although the amount of water needed to irrigate these 60 acres must be staggering, I am ever-so-grateful for the ability to eat actual fresh produce again. (Did you know that the average age of any random apple for sale in your supermarket’s produce section is 16 months? Yep, 16 months since that sucker was picked…and it’s still red. Creepy, huh?)

Last week, we picked about a dozen gorgeous, ripe tomatoes (and a few green ones for frying), along with just-pulled onions and garlic, a couple precious Armenian cucumbers (melons), and even peaches. It’s nearly and hour’s drive, on the Super Fun Vegas Freeway, from my place to Gilcrease, so you’ve really gotta want those tomatoes. They’re worth it, let me tell you, to a gal who never ate store-bought produce until she left home, and never saw a white egg ’til then either.

 

 

I Do Domestic. Kinda.

Dana Kane Bakes

 

This pumpkin bread tastes fantastic. Much better than it looks, to be sure. That’s because I dropped it HARD when pulling the loaf pan out of the oven. After having finally perfected my gluten free pumpkin bread recipe and baking technique, I dropped the damned thing. Sideways. It skidded onto the stovetop at an angle, causing the whole loaf to sort of…compact inside the pan.

So what we have here is really yummy yet somewhat ugly and dense domesticity, cooked up by yours truly. Enjoy!

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Dana Kane, Spanked.

 

Well, it’s happened. I’ve gone and gotten myself spanked.

Deserved it, too. Had it coming.

 

Can I tell you about it?

 

You know I spank people, and you know I make spanking videos; today, I was supposed to make new video. It was all planned out, and a day overdue.

But I couldn’t decide what to wear. One wardrobe malfunction led to another, which led to another, which led to my spending about ninety minutes standing in the walk-in closet, amidst an ever-increasing mountain of discarded skirts and blouses.

My dearest darling honey was patient as always….to a point…until I finally blurted out something like, “There is NOTHING in this damn closet!” He then very calmly explained to me that there would be no video shot today, not like this, as I had sucked all the fun out of the room.

I stomped into the bathroom, removed my makeup, tossed on a tank top, and walked back out to find him standing there, waiting, patiently again.

“Come in here, it’s time for your spanking,” he said, and I laughed and laughed. “What spanking?”

“The spanking you have coming after that crap you pulled. We could’ve been finished already, and now we’re getting nothing done at all. Well, we’re making video today – one way or another.”

“Ahaha! You’re going to spank ME? Like, right now?”

“Yep.”

“And you’re going to record it?”

“Yep.”

Here, I will admit, I could have reacted in a few different ways. For some reason today, I decided to go with it. Yes, I had been an enormous pain in the ass this morning, and yes, I had single-handedly seen to it that we got no work done, so….okay. Why not.

“Alright, cowboy. Let’s go.”

So keep in mind when you see the photo below that neither I, nor he, planned to share it with you when it was shot. He actually did threaten to post it up on spankingtube the way I’ve done to him, so many times. He was a teeny bit irritated, I was stressed-out, and this fun spanking ended up making us both feel immensely better.

When I played the video back, I thought, “Hmm, that’s not too bad at all, is it? I mean, my ass COULD look a lot worse, and it’s been – what? – four years since I was last spanked?” After watching the video through, quite honestly, three or four times – laughing at myself really hard and wondering whether to share it with anyone – I decided, why the hell not? It’s raw video, there’s no editing, no fancy lighting, hell, I’m not even wearing Fancy Panties. There’s also the unavoidable fact that this is a very close-up, very intimate camera angle, which happens to highlight the entire…general area. Then I thought, “Eh, hell, we can handle it. We’re all adults.” So here ya go, kiddos:

Dana Kane, Spanked.

danakanespanked-001

I spend a lot of time spanking people, and while you all know just how much I LOVE it, today it wasn’t happening. Well, it happened, just not the way we’d planned. Funny how things work, huh? And therapeutic, too, because it’s nice to remember that nobody, but nobody, can be on top ALL the time.

 

And before you ask – no, it’s not on the DanaKaneSpanks.com member site, and there’s no free preview video. Say what you will, but my backside doesn’t come out often and when it does, well…

 

*Warning : If you do not want to see images and video of me being spanked, do not click the clips4sale link.

** Warning : The video is raw and unedited. It’s also pretty damned close-up. If you do not want to see raw, unedited, close-up video of me being spanked, do not click the clips4sale link.

** WARNING : Really, seriously, this is NOT a video you want to watch if you are at all turned off by the idea of my being spanked, naked, or letting my guy turn the tables on me with a lexan paddle.

danakanespanked

** FINAL WARNING : If you do choose to view this video, you will see me doing things which I do not tolerate from my playmates. This flies directly in the face of everything, and I have no defense. The following video contains: Squirming, Begging, Cursing, Rolling, Reaching the Hands Back, and Kicking the Feet. Cut me some slack – it’s been a long time.

With all that said, here’s the link:

Dana Kane, Spanked. Video.

 

 

 

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Slap that Ass/Lamp/Artwork !?

 

Okay, this may be the most fun thing I’ve seen in a loong time.

It’s also not available for purchase yet, and when it is it’ll be pretty damn pricey, but I had to share this with all of you anyway.

Because, well….just watch the video:

 

 

Thanks to sweet Cras for sending me this crazycool link.

 

–  Dana

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Wasting Time

 

Readers,

What, you may wonder, do others do on the internet? Do other folks spend as much time looking at adult content as you do? (yes); does everyone get lost in the cute baby animal videos on youtube? (I do); is there really any redeeming value in online games? (probably not)

We all, to a person, waste time online. Many would argue that you are doing exactly that, right now, reading this post. Wasting time.

But it isn’t all a waste, right? We read the news, stay in touch with friends and family, and learn about the world around us all at the touch of a few sticky little buttons nowadays. There’s not much you can’t do online anymore – but so far it’s not possible to get a virtual spanking so I’m not terribly worried about the internet taking over the world.

I am, however, worried about dumb stuff on the internet getting more (WAY more) play than cool, smart stuff. While I’m sure that lots of people would disagree with me, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that neither first-person shooter games, nor pinterest, nor snapchat, will make you grow as a person.

Now I’m not suggesting that you need to grow – in fact I’m sure that you’re perfectly happy with your intellectual capacities – but just in case there’s a teeny part of you that’s wondering whether or not you’ve come to the End of the Internet, here are a few things online that will NOT rot your brain.

Check out:

 

Zooniverse  –  According to the website, “We make citizen science websites so that everyone can be part of real research online.” You can help explore outer space (literally), decode whale song, or even track the movement of animals in the Serengeti. These interactive online, public science projects are not just a fun way to while away a few hours; they’re a real, effective way for every single person on the planet to take part in it’s study. Amazing!

Track Katherine the Shark…or Fritz, or Philip, or Yolanda. The people at Ocearch.org use real-time satellite tracking to keep updated data on dozens of tagged sharks.

Pogo.com  –  like Luminosity, but for people who know better than pay 75 dollars to play games. Word games, puzzles, brain teasers, and a bunch of other silly stuff, too.

Google Earth  – Seriously, if you haven’t used the little yellow man on Google Earth to literally stroll down the streets of a teeny town on an itsy island in the middle of the ocean (any ocean – they’re everywhere) – one that you didn’t even know existed till you zoomed WAY in – then you haven’t used the internet properly. Start over.

While you’re exploring, you can also see a live, real-time video feed from just about anyplace in the world at EarthCam.com. Always wanted to visit someplace seemingly exotic? See what it looks like right this minute!

Okay, that’s enough time wasted here today – let’s all go back to looking at kittens on youtube now.

–  Dana

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‘Amy’s First Spanking’ : Sin City Spanks entry

 

Readers,

Finally, ‘Amy’s First Spanking’, a great way to end May’s Sin City Spanks story contest entries – have fun with this one, and stay tuned for the next spanking story contest!

–  Dana

 

Amy’s First Spanking

My name is Amy and I am a 21 year old former Las Vegas showgirl.  I was abandoned by my parents as an infant and raised in foster homes.  I was putting myself through college at U.N.L.V. as a showgirl until I got involved with a gangster twice my age.  I was enamored by his good looks, smooth talking, the way he threw his money around, and his celebrity friends.  Because of his fast lane life style I dropped out of college and into the Las Vegas nightlife.  I am currently lying in bed at the luxurious Vegas hotel where I was employed as a showgirl with a very sore well spanked bottom.  It was my first spanking ever and I’m afraid it won’t be my last.  I will never have to wonder again how a spanking feels!  I am a former showgirl as of about two hours ago when I decided to drop my gangster boyfriend and the Vegas nightlife in exchange for finishing college.

My former boyfriend is a thief and a jerk; but, I never realized it until tonight.  Little did I know that the money he threw around came from extorting money from the casino in Carolyn’s hotel.  Carolyn is a gorgeous motherly beauty who was celebrating her 50th birthday and looks 20 years younger.  She is 6′ tall weighs 140 lbs, has red hair, brown eyes and a muscular well toned body.  She is accompanied by her husband of three years Jonathan, who is about one half her age and 5’5″ tall, her lawyer Alexis is  a 6′ blond bombshell of 30, and Alexis’ lover Megan who is 5’4″ tall and 25 years old and looks like a college coed.

Carolyn has turned the 500 million dollars she inherited from her 1st husband Douglas into over a billion dollars.  She suspected that money was missing from her Las Vegas casino.  She has a dominate relationship with her younger husband Jonathan.  Carolyn pays the bills and Jonathan keeps house.  If he screws up its over her knee!  Jonathon worked for Carolyn before their marriage and is a computer whiz.  He checked the financial statements and discovered 50,000 dollars was missing.  He was able to trace the missing money to a floor manager in her casino.

Alexis contracted with her investigation agency and evidence revealed that my gangster boyfriend was extorting money from our floor manager who had a dubious past.  He was terminated and in exchange for not being prosecuted revealed that James was dating me and and all of the details of the extortion.  I was shocked when the hotel casino owner contacted me, a mere showgirl in her hotel, and wanted me to arrange for James and me to come to her pent house suite for drinks after my show that evening.  That evening we were introduced to Alexis, Megan, and Jonathan by Carolyn.  It was all business and James was confronted with the evidence against him gathered by Alexis’ agency.  He realized that with his criminal record and Carolyn’s and Alexis’ connections that most likely he would do prison time.  That is when Alexis dropped the bomb that Jonathan had heard before he and Carolyn were married and the petulant professor had heard after stealing a colleague’s research at the University of Colorado.  If he agreed to pay back the 50,000 dollars and accept a spanking from Carolyn and a caning from Alexis no charges would be pursued.

James agreed to Alexis’ terms.  She pulled a contract from her briefcase that James signed along with a wicked looking Spencer style paddle that made Megan and Jonathan cringe.  As I learned later both had been on the receiving end too many times and both hated the experience.  James was in tears and I was seeing him in a new light for the first time.  He wasn’t the man that I had been so stricken by!   Carolyn placed a straight back chair in the middle of the room and sit with the paddle on her lap.  James was ordered to her left side where Carolyn unbuckled his belt and lowered his pants to his knees.  She raised her short ivory silk skirt above her stocking tops and forced James over her right thigh and clamped her left leg over his legs.  Her well toned muscular right arm wrapped around his torso rendering him totally helpless.  James was pinned helplessly and Carolyn proved to be an expert spanker paddling up one side and down the other followed by a series of spanks up and down the middle of his now crimson bottom.  Next she alternated from cheek to cheek finishing on his upper thighs.  Being pinned and helpless over her lap all he could do was plead, cry, and struggle in vain as Carolyn left the imprint of her paddle on his cherry red behind.  I realized that I never wanted to see him again.  Alexis grabbed James arms as Carolyn released him from her lap and forced him over the back of a lounge chair.  Carolyn took James’ wrists and pinned him over the chair where Alexis stair cased his bottom with 12 angry wilts with her cane.  Each stripe was about one inch above the next with none crisscrossing the other.  The bawling James was shoved out of Carolyn’s suite with his crimson striped bottom before he could pull his pants back up!  Alexis’ last words to him were, “You are luck I don’t have a horse whip!”

When the five of us discussed what had just happened I was in tears and shared with them that I never wanted to see James again.  During our discussion I learned that both Megan and Jonathan were spanked if they failed to preform their household duties or their significant other believed they needed a maintaince spanking.  Although their spankings were not as severe as an the one Carolyn and Alexis gave to James, they both hated being spanked but admitted that a good spanking cleared the air.  I explained that I felt terrible about the time I had wasted with James and that allowing the night life I spent partying with him to cause me to drop out of college.  Carolyn informed me that she thought  that I would benefit from a sound spanking and if I was her daughter she would put me over her knee.  At that moment I hugged Carolyn and began crying again as I explained that I never knew my mother.  Carolyn was old enough to be my mother and I explained, “I have never been spanked and have no idea how a spanking feels; but, since you think I would benefit from a spanking and both Jonathan and Megan said that a spanking cleared the air I need to be spanked.”

Carolyn agreed but said, “Spankings are suppose to hurt and once I turn you over my knee it will be too late for you to change your mind and you will be a very unhappy little girl long before I’m finished.”  She hugged me and added, “I will pay the rest of your way through college but right now we have some business to take care of!”  Carolyn sit on the straight backed chair still in the center of the room and smoothed her ivory silk skirt with the Spencer style paddle on her lap.  She raised my skirt and put me over her knee.  She  rubbed my thin nylon white panties and said,” You will be kicking,  squirming, and dancing across my lap and that is O.K. I will have no trouble keeping you in place.”

I tried to be stoic as she began paddling my thin nylon panties but was soon crying out and dancing across her lap.  Carolyn spanked up one side and down the other and then began alternating from cheek to cheek.  Next she paddled the middle of my bottom to the top of my legs.  When  she finally left me off of her lap I danced around the room.  My eyes were teary and puffy and tears were making my mascara run down my face.  I was still crying uncontrollable when Carolyn hugged me and Alexis rubbed lotion on my stinging bottom.  I didn’t realize how much a sound spanking from a capable woman hurt.  As Carolyn had promised I was a well spanked unhappy girl.  I understood why Jonathan and Megan hated being spanked.  After three years of spanking Jonathan Carolyn had become an expert disciplinarian.   I thanked Carolyn for caring enough to discipline me and helping me finish college.

After my spanking Megan went to the kitchen and returned with a cake for Carolyn’s 50th birthday celebration.  Alexis removed her suit jacket and sit on the same straight backed chair in the middle of the room and smoothed her skirt.  Alexis had paddled Carolyn three years ago and that was the only paddling Carolyn had ever received.  Alexis informed Carolyn that she was going to receive a birthday hand spanking over her knee.  Jonathan and Megan escorted Carolyn to Alexis’ side where Alexis raised her silk  skirt to her waist and lowered her nylon panties to her knees.  Everyone was laughing except Alexis who was all business.  During her hand spanking over Alexis’ knee she never cried out and meekly submitted but I could tell by the expression on her face and her cherry red bottom outlined by her garter belt and stockings  that a hand spanking over Alexis’ knee was a very painful experience.

After Carolyn’s birthday spanking we all enjoyed white wine, cake and many laughs.  I was invited to spend the night in Carolyn’s suite.  Carolyn was going to pay for my final year of college and promised to fly back to Vegas if I needed help in maintaining my grades or any other goals that I had set for myself.  I never knew my mother but I loved Carolyn like the mother I never had.