…it’s my birthday too.
(Insert that cheesy birthday song here.)
October’s my birthday month, and this year I’m turning 41. I’m still waiting for that upset/obsession about being over 40, but as it hasn’t happened yet I cannot comment on what the fuss is all about. I know that, by societal mores, women are suddenly *of a certain age* when they are no longer in their thirties, and they’re not supposed to be happy about it. (It should be noted that I am deliriously happy to be ANY age, because that means that I’m still here. This is a recurring theme for me, apparently. Attendance.)
Other things of note:
When you’re (a woman) over 40, all of a sudden folks think it’s a compliment to say “Wow. You don’t LOOK forty (or fifty, or whatever)!”.
That’s not a compliment.
What the hell do you think forty (or fifty, or whatever) is supposed to look like? Should a woman no longer thought of as ‘youthful’ all of a sudden develop a dowager’s hump and conspicuous upper lip hair? Must we all sag and bag and droop in inappropriate places? That sounds more like 80 than 40, doesn’t it?
Once we’ve left our most-sensibly-timed childbearing years behind, we are also supposed to be less sexy, in practice and in perception – somehow, by process of elimination of viable pregnancy and gestation (which, I cannot stress enough, is NOT a bad thing), our hotness factor is somehow inexplicably reduced. Here, I challenge any woman who’s lived through her 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s (or beyond) to announce that she felt more sexy, sensual, and body-confident in her twenties than she does now. I, for one, am more happy with my physical reality than I’ve ever been – because it’s CONFIDENCE and EXPERIENCE which are really important…collagen’s just a pretty wrapper.
This isn’t to say that vanity isn’t a part of my middle-age reality. I know that I’m 20 years older than I was 20 years ago, and I know that nobody in their right mind would card me for booze at this juncture in my life. I’m okay with both of those things, and with the knowledge that, no matter how others may perceive me –
I’m here. And I’m happy. And that’s all that matters. (Even if I do sometimes do that thing in the mirror where you pull your cheeks up with your index fingers to simulate a Joan-Rivers-facelift-look.)
– Dana
If you’re a gift-giver, below are a couple links which you may peruse:
DONATE to the Nevada SPCA (Where we recently adopted Buddy, our sweet little elderly MinPin. Hundreds of rescued dogs, cats, and other pets daily.)
DONATE to the Salvation Army (They do good things, right in your community, every day.)
My Amazon.com WishList
Happy Birthday Miss Kane! :)
WHO is the luck recipient of YOUR 41 spanks plus the one to grow on? There’s NO way you would let Angel or YOUR bottom get a little sweet revenge on camera?!
You make a terrific point about being happy to be ANY age. People who take care of themselves tend to age well and it’s difficult to discern exactly what calendar age they are. If people are so intent on telling someone they look great for a certain age, I think the safer approach is to mention a varying age range. If someone asks me to guess the age of another person or THEMSELVES I tend to say something like late 30s-early 40s. Covering multiple decades spares insulted age-ees. LOL.
I only have two comments as it relates to becoming old:
1. Growing old is not for cowards and
2. The first sign of growing old is, stopping at yellow lights.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Ms. Kane
Happy birthday, Ms Kane. Or, how we say in my language, “Buon compleanno”.
You are right about the things you said. If you are happy, who cares if you are 20, 30, or 60 years old?
When I look in the mirror, and I see a small wrinkle on my face, I smile remembering what Anna Magnani, an amazing actress, said once: “Do not cover wrinles. It took me a lifetime to get me to come.” And: “The most important thing is not to have wrinkles on your brain. The others, they are waiting for you”.
Hopefully you won’t mind that one of your presents is not on your wishlist… I purchased it before I read this post. There’s just nothing that can be done about it, but I don’t think you’ll complain :) You are amazing. I don’t think anyone’s really looking at you and trying to guess your age. It’s about quality, not quantity. I think now you need to go knock some sense into Alexis over here for her cute comment! I think I’d die of fear before even getting close enough to you to try something so bold… funny, funny. As an aside, you’re not adding comments to the items on your wishlist, and that’s always how I decide what the best thing to get you is! How are we supposed to know if a pickle paddle is more important than an canoe paddle? I’m very perplexed ;)
Love you,
^i^ Angel ^i^
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MISS KANE,
My birthday is the 13th and I am going to be 44 this year and am not ashamed of that for one second. I don’t look anywhere close to my age most think I am in my mid 20’s and I sadly still get carded for alcohol and lottery tickets or to get into the Casino!! I don’t care though I will keep my baby face as long as I can after all it helps me sometimes to get out of trouble. “grins”
It is only a number I don’t think my age defines me, I think who I am and how I treat others defines me. You are beautiful and I never think of age when I see you because it doesn’t matter it is “you” I want to see!! Happy Birthday you are the best.
Happy birthday. My birthday is the 15 th of October I will be 43
Happy Birthdays, Dana. No gratuitous age comments from here, although with all due respect, your work with Angel may land you in a tennis elbow brace prematurely.