Dec 122014


Fellow spankos,

I regularly ask my new playmates, especially those who’ve not experienced much (or any) spanking play before, “What’s been swirling around in your mind? What do you think about when you think about your ‘ideal’ spanking?”

This is a great question for all of us, I think. What, if given the choice to have it happen ANY way you want, would be your ideal spanking scenario? Doesn’t matter whether you’re a top, a bottom, or a switch, or whether the spanking that you consider the best would be given or taken, either. We all have a main fantasy I think – the one that plays most often in our heads – and I’m interested in yours.

Tell me about your ‘ideal’ spanking in the comments area, so that others can join in the Conversation.


–  Dana

Nov 132014



Oftentimes when talking with my fellow spankos, the subject of spanking videos comes up – naturally. Lots of my friends refer to spanking videos as ‘spanking porn’, and I’ve even done so on a couple of occasions. However, I don’t consider most spanking videos that I watch to be porn at all, so I’m not sure how exactly a non-sex impact fetish video becomes ‘porn’.

Is it because of the nudity? No, there’s all kinds of non-sexual nudity in the world, all the time. Is it the hitting? Of course not. Hitting is rarely eroticized outside the BDSM community, I’d imagine(?). So what is it about nude + hitting that = porn?

I know, I know..there’s lots of spanking-sex videos out there, and I’m not averse to those even though they’re usually not my taste (I like my spanking and sex videos served separate most of the time); I’m talking here about straight up, domestic discipline videos and/or corporal punishment videos …are they porn? Are they spanking porn? Do you use the term, or find it unfitting?

By taking a look at search engine ratings, the term ‘spanking porn’ is searched many hundreds of times more, exponentially, than the term ‘domestic discipline’ or ‘adult spanking’ – is there a crossover with mainstream sex and adult video here, do you think? Are ‘vanilla’s’ interested in spanking too, when it’s wrapped up in an otherwise vanilla porn video? I don’t imagine that a whole lot of non-spankos spend their time running down strictly-spanking videos, but maybe I’m way off the mark here. (Sadly, not a lot of non-spankos are running down spanko blogs either, so we’ll likely not get much input on the subject from the 99.997%.)

But there’s always us, and I’m always curious about your opinions on any and all things spanking – and so are your fellow readers, so leave your two cents in the comments section and let’s have a Conversation!


–  Dana


Oct 022014


So what’s the deal with guys wearing panties, anyway?

There seems to be some confusion.



There are lots of reasons why a man might find himself interested in ladies panties, but I want to talk about the reasons he may want to try them on..


Some men who wear underthings designed for women identify as cross dressers, and this identification often includes other items of women’s clothing worn along with those lacy briefs (thongs usually don’t work for guys, for obvious reasons). Cross dressing doesn’t necessarily indicate transgender or homosexual interest – it’s common for hetero-identified, ‘masculine’ men to cross dress.

Others like to wear panties but don’t really care for all the other accouterments of feminine dress (okay, maybe the occasional pair of nude thigh-high stockings..) – I fondly call these fellas ‘panty boys’. They’re just into the feel and texture and fit of the garment, and there’s still something slightly naughty about wearing them.


There’s a common misconception that a man in panties is something less than attractive…I cannot imagine why. Just look at the above screengrab – taken from a recent youtube video showing guys trying on panties for the first time – those perky, satin-covered bums look pretty cute to me.


Several of my male playmates choose to wear panties for their spankings, and many more have been ‘sentenced’ to the task. I am always tickled under any circumstance by which I can see one of my Tough Guys tucked into one of Victoria’s better-kept secrets.

Guys, where are you on this? (Obviously, you can comment anonymously) Are you into the occasional full-bottom satin brief? If so, care to explain it to those who may not understand?….

And ladies, what about you? Does the idea of your man/partner/spankee in panties make you giggle, or cringe? Why?


–  Dana


Sep 192014


( Spankos, this is usually all about us, from us, by us, and from our perspectives. This time, I’d like to ask those of you who have the lucky fortune of having an openminded NON-spanko in your lives to read the below and possibly give us their insights. I don’t want your opinions this time, kiddos, and don’t want the ‘my wife says’ either. I want to hear from the actual NON-spanko partners, friends, etc. in your lives who know and are willing to participate. Pass this on if you think yours is willing to contribute to our understanding of their views.)


An open request to those of you who know and love someone with a spanking fetish:


Maybe you participate in spanking with your partner/friend, and maybe you don’t; possibly you try very hard to understand his or her desire for this type of activity, and possibly you think it’s the strangest damn thing you’ve ever heard of. Maybe you’ve done some research on your own to see what it’s all about, or maybe you just don’t want to know…

We – the people in your lives who ARE into spanking – want to know what you think of it all. Really, we do. Don’t just tell us what we want to hear, either, we can handle the truth.

You see, when a person thinks about spanking whether they want to or not (which is how many, if not most, of us feels), it colors their perceptions of the act itself. What someone like you, who isn’t compelled to participate in spanking, understand about our interests is important – we want you to understand, and we want you to be ‘okay’ with something that we may feel a bit unsure about, ourselves. The best way to get you ‘okay’ is to give you the chance to tell us, the spanking enthusiasts, what you think.

If you’re reading this, it’s likely because someone’s asked you to – and I’ll ask that you now take a minute to respond via the comments feature, so that we’ll know how YOU feel.


–  Dana



Aug 282014


Last time round we talked about the bad and ugly, so let’s uplift things a bit this week. This one’s simple:


Tell us about your BEST spanking experience – was it your first-ever spanking? Your hardest? Most recent? Are they *all* the best?


Leave your great spanking experiences in the comments area so that others (especially those who may be new to it all) can see just how much fun we can have when we do it Right.


(Since so many of my great experiences have been videotaped (think Delrin punishments, cruise ships, and water guns), I’ll simply direct you to the Free Videos to see some of mine…)


–  Dana