Twenty-plus years ago, when I was trying to figure out the best way to make money for records, candy, and the occasional movie ticket, it never occurred to me to attempt babysitting. Having to slog over to some semi-stranger’s house in the late evening hours to sit around on their furniture, eat their weird food, and watch over their annoying if terribly cute progeny? Yeah, no thanks. I’d rather just take the 60/40 chance on begging extra hard for an early allowance allotment.
But things are a bit different now, as I’m no longer desperate for Smarties and Molly Ringwald films, so there are better choices. Now when I babysit, it’s a fun frolic through round-the-clock roleplay with who are, quite possibly, some of the naughtiest adult boys and girls ever. A recent sleepover found the boy in question having his coloring book tossed into the hallway for housekeeping to pick up. It’s tough being a firm and loving caretaker, but I do my very best given the terrible state of most of my charges’ manners.
The point of all this is to set the backdrop for a public shaming earned by previous mentioned boy. After some particularly surly behavior during his babysitting time, he was assigned a report on ‘How to Be Nice to Miss Dana’….
which has not been turned in on time.
Said young man knew that there would be consequences if his assignment was not finished on time, and one of those is contained here. When he reads this, along with all of you, he’ll learn that his first punishment is to go DIRECTLY to the nearest corner, where he will stand for exactly fifteen minutes. (Are you getting this? I mean right now, mister.) He has further 24 hours to complete the assignment or will be rewarded with 100 strokes of the spencer paddle for his inability to follow instructions.
I hope that this, in addition to further instructions on Good Manners and Proper Behavior, affects an immediate change for the better.
If not, well…that’ll be fun, too.