After having read her post describing Alex Reynold’s recent accidental familial outing, I am curious about the ‘out’ status of other spankos.
My (admittedly, few) family know about my lifestyle and profession – my somewhat infamous auntie is tickled by the whole idea and asks pointed and sometimes slightly uncomfortable questions. In truth, nobody seemed particularly surprised.
My friends know, too, naturally; many of them are ‘lifestylers’ of some description or other, so our conversations are easy and free and would likely be disturbing if overheard on the train. Those who are by our terms vanilla usually do their best to seem laid-back and cool about the whole thing but aren’t very interested in the details.
But in public, social situations, I’m inclined to tell a stranger that I am a ‘consultant’, rather than try and explain what a fetishist is and possibly offend someone’s sensibilities (or blow their mind) in the process. This is done out of kindness to the kink-ignorant, in my opinion, and is not an indicator of my not being okay with who/what I am.
(As an aside, why are we all so interested in what others ‘do for a living’? It is often one of the first questions people ask new acquaintances. The answer is supposed to indicate our financial status, and is almost always boring. I think that this possibly borders on bad manners.)
A talk today with one of my friends yielded more ‘who knows’ questions, as she’s seeing someone new. Someone New isn’t sure whether he’s okay with her lifestyle/profession, and she isn’t sure that she’s okay with his uncertainty. He knew since their first meeting, when she proudly outed herself.
So, for all of you: Who knows about your fetish (or lifestyle)? And how does if affect your relationships?
Are you ‘out’ to a group of like-minded friends, but your family and coworkers are oblivious?
Have you outed yourself, or had it done for you – and what were the implications?
And how does having to keep back a part of oneself affect our personalities?
PS. Thanks to Alex for sharing her process, and for being a generally great woman.
Visit my premium video, DVD, and products website at DanaKaneSpanks.com.