Apr 302011
 
In less than two weeks I will visit New York City again (and Boston and Philadelphia), and have spent recent weeks fielding email inquiries from potential playmates.  One of the emails that I received was of particular interest because it was written by a gentleman in a long-term, female-led domestic discipline relationship. His request, echoed in subsequent correspondence with his wife, was that I consider a serious discipline session with him, to help them deal with some of his recent actions.
After some correspondence, we three have agreed upon and scheduled his discipline. 


This is not role-play. Nor is it foreplay. It is not ‘play’ at all.


This loving and committed couple have chosen mutually to adhere to their domestic discipline relationship, and she is their chosen Head of Household. It is her considered opinion to which I defer…that the situation warrants the intervention of a third party who is not invested emotionally in the circumstances.


Today, I received an email from him. He will be keeping a journal of sorts leading up to our meeting in two weeks, in an attempt to come to terms with quite a lot of well-deserved anxiety. As a part of this process, he has offered to share parts of this journal with readers of my blog. I believe that this exercise fosters honesty and openness and encourage him in the endeavor.   – Dana


Below, his journal entry:

The old adage “Be careful what you ask for because you might just get it” rings true
for me, I have asked for and received an appointment with Miss Kane during her
upcomint travel to NYC. While normally this would be cause for
excitement,  it is for me an unfortunate event. Instead of looking forward to some
fun role playing with Miss Kane or enjoying some OTK time with her, I am going to
see her to receive a much needed punishment for some real life infractions. My behavior
over the last year has been very poor and is deserving of a severe punishment. While I
am in a committed and loving FLDD relationship with my wife, we have discussed
the need for and the possibility of finding an impartial disciplinarian who is not
hindered by any emotional attachment to deliver a severe punishment for my past
behavior. I made a comment about Miss Kane coming to NYC and maybe we could
get her to administer my punishment. That simple comment led to the exchanging of
a few e-mails which ultimately led to an appointment with Miss Kane. So now I
find myself nervously waiting for an upcoming punishment administered by Miss Kane.
What I thought was just an off handed comment that had no chance of actually
happening has turned into a reality. My wife has told me very clearly that I do not
have a choice about going and that I WILL keep this appointment.  What follows are
my thoughts leading up to the fateful day when I receive my punishment from Miss Kane.

Well I am 15 days out from my visit with Miss Kane, I got up this morning determined
that I would not spend any time today dwelling on the upcoming visit.  I have tried to
keep my mind occupied throughout the day and not think about what the visit will be
like, but I have not been very successful. I can only play a mental picture of
the session in my head so many times before I drive myself crazy. 
Since I have never had a session with Miss Kane before I have nothing to base my
thoughts on other than the few videos I have seen on her blog.  While I am nervous
about my actual visit, I am even more nervous about the impending phone call that Miss
Kane will make to my wife to discuss my upcoming punishment. I do not know when
she will call, all I know is that she is going to E-mail my wife before she calls so they
can set up a time to talk (I hope it is not when I am at work). I don’t even know if my
wife will let me know if or when she talks with Miss Kane. After they talk I am
expecting an E-mail to verify our appointment, I don’t know if it will be a short, brief
and to the point E-mail, or maybe a longer one with some scolding added for good
measure. Who knows, all I know is it will make me even more nervous about my visit.
Maybe tomorrow I will do a better job with not thinking about the upcoming visit …
But then again probably not.

Visit my premium video, DVD, and products website at DanaKaneSpanks.com.
Apr 282011
 

(What? You thought that there were no more reader-submitted F/M Spanking stories? Wrong. Here’s another great one…   – Dana)
 

*****


I grew up in the 1950s, when most mothers were
the housekeepers and didn’t have to go back to
work as soon as the kids were old enough to
leave in the care of someone else. I’d often
go home with friends after school for a couple
of hours of play or study before dinner, so we
got to know our friends’ mothers nearly as
well as our own. Friends shared a lot about
their home lives, so, among other “secrets,” we
knew who got spankings at home. It was nearly always
Mom who did the spanking
because she was there when a spanking was called for.

Another thing about the stay-at-home moms of
that era was that unless they had to leave the
house to go shopping or meet a friend, they frequently
wouldn’t get fully dressed
until dinnertime. It wasn’t unusual, particularly in
pre-air conditioning Summers, to see a woman wearing
only a slip while at home. A full slip
covered what needed to be covered for modesty,
it was cool and comfortable, and, at least
within the family (which included the kids’ friends) it
wasn’t an embarrassing state of
undress. It wasn’t until my teens when I
started going to movies that I realized that a
woman in a slip implied a certain sexiness and
intimacy. In today’s movies, we have “partial nudity”
and “mature” ratings for that.

“Settle down or I’ll spank you both!” was a
frequent warning from the mother of one of my best
friends in Junior High School.
While she never carried out that threat on my backside,
there were times when she’d
come over to where
we were playing, drag my friend off to his
room, and soon I’d hear the sounds of spanking
coming from upstairs. A few minutes later, they’d come
back downstairs hand in hand,
she warm and comforting, he a little shaky, and then
we’d go back to our play.

Fast-forward twenty years. I have a good job with an
engineering firm. I enjoy my work and
the people I work with, I’m doing well, getting
frequent awards and bonuses, and
thinking life is good there. One afternoon,
however, the personnel director (they didn’t
call it Human Resources yet) asked me to come
to her office. This was sort of like being
called to the principal’s office at school. I went right
up, she greeted me, and she asked
me to come in and close the office door.

She told me that she was investigating a
rather curious complaint. One of the women in
my office said that occasionally she would get
an uncomfortable feeling when I was around
her, like a feeling that she was being watched.
This didn’t happen all the time, but
it bothered her and she wondered if maybe it
was HER problem. It wasn’t classic sexual
harassment because I had never made any
advances to her, nor said anything
offensive, nor touched her in an inappropriate manner.
Sometimes, she said, she just felt
uncomfortable around me, almost like she was being
watched.

The personnel director initially thought that
this woman was just uptight about something,
but after she heard pretty much the same story
from a couple of other women in the office, she
decided that there might be something to
it. She wanted to make me aware of what she
had been hearing and try to learn what was going on.

After some fumbling around for words, I
explained that for me, seeing a flash of slip
lace was a turn-on. It suggested to me that the woman
was mature, authoritative, a little sexy without being
blatent, and maybe a little old fashioned. (It never
occurred to me that
she might just be a sloppy dresser.) And, yes,
when I noticed a woman with her slip showing,
I would try harder to catch a glimpse than
probably what was politically correct.

The whole story of my youth tumbled out; mother in
her slip, the spankings I heard
but never received or even directly witnessed. The
personnel director, with her background in
psychology and therapy, put it all together and
concluded that I had a pent-up craving to
get the spanking from mom-in-her-slip that I
never received as a child.

She didn’t want my actions to lead to a sexual
harassment lawsuit, nor did she want to fire
me since I was a valuable asset to the company.
She thought, however, that she might be able
to help me understand my suppressed feelings and,
in the process, break this
annoying little habit. She felt it best to keep this
private, so she asked me to come to her home
the following Sunday afternoon.

She greeted me at the door dressed in a slip,
just like my best friend’s mother of
twenty years ago, only this time we were about the
same age. She offered me a cup of coffee, and
we went over the details of my story one more
time. She said  she spanked her own children,
so she had plenty of experience in that area,
and she could see no reason why she shouldn’t
give me that spanking that I secretly craved.

She wasted no time pulling me across her lap and
lowering my pants. With the palm of
her hand on my bare bottom, she taught me a lesson
about respect, and that a woman was not a sex
object no matter how she dressed. She’d
occasionally let me up and “test” me by
watching to see if I glanced at her slip as we
sat talking. As soon as I did, it was back
over her lap for another dose of her medicine.

Eventually she got through to me. I calmed down,
and she allowed me to go home,reminding me to be
on my best behavior in the office from then on.

Visit my premium video, DVD, and products website at DanaKaneSpanks.com.
Apr 282011
 

 Implements do not have to be pretty. In fact, sometimes the ugliest ones (like my trusty ‘Smashball’ paddle) work best – and certainly good, sturdy craftsmanship is most important. However, one does like to add a bit of flair now and then…

I am currently obsessed with Jonathan’s Spoons – here’s why:

I would feel somewhat guilty about dipping one of these spoons into a pan of sauce, but would have no such reservations about using them on a recalcitrant bottom. And take a look at that wooden whisk!




While ‘on’ bottoms:
In my (totally biased and 100% voyeuristic) opinion, all boys should own at least one pair of these:



…spotty body hair removal and ‘compensation abs’ not required.


– Dana

Visit my premium video, DVD, and products website at DanaKaneSpanks.com.
Apr 262011
 

During a recent spanking I asked for a verbal acknowledgment of the current level of discomort that my bottom was experiencing – a ‘check-in’, so to speak. Unable to properly vocalize this, my spankee was at a bit of a loss. In a follow-up communication I received an excellent question.
 The question was something like: “With no prior experience to build on, how do I determine the difference between, say, a 5 and a 6? What do YOU consider a 5 or 6, and, how do I figure that out?” (Let me interject that the inquirer’s language was much more succinct…)

My reply:  ‘In studying tolerance and ‘rating’, I’ve found that everyone has a different set of factors in determining their 1-10 scale. As we communicate and (both) learn your tolerance and needs, you will come to develop your own system. It is my job to interpret your scale, not the other way around. As your experiences increase, you’ll have more data to decide these nuances.’

I am curious now – how do all of you determine your tolerance? What factors are considered? Strictly pyhsical discomfort, psychological/emotional state, verbal interference, environment? (I understand that the use of a 1-10 scale cannot be interpreted literally, but is a technique that I use occasionally to determine the general comfort/discomfort level of a playmate if it is not immediately apparent.)
Also, do you other spanking tops ever employ a base 10 scale for determining pain, tolerance, or discomfort? If so, how do you relate to the determinations made by your bottoms?  

I am interested in your thoughts on this subject…please reply via the comment box below so that other readers may also benefit from your wisdom.


– Dana

Hospitals and other Medical providers use a pain scale like this one.
Visit my premium video, DVD, and products website at DanaKaneSpanks.com.
Apr 252011
 
It is unusual for me to comment on sessions without request of my playmates, but today’s spanking is an exception to the rule. I don’t spank and tell, so there will be no details, but this particular session bears mentioning.
Why? Because today I had the rare honor of providing a woman with her first ever adult spanking. This lovely and intelligent, grown woman stepped way outside of her comfort zone today – and trusted me enough to go there with her. I was, and am, impressed. 
I am impressed every single time someone manages the mental fortitude to overcome fearing the unknown in order to increase their happiness. Bravo!
And, while I adore my male playmates and their boxers/briefs, pastel full-bottom satin panties were certainly a sight for sore eyes..

 *****

I took several photos during another recent spanking (by request, naturally) and am dismayed to find that the combination of low lighting, dark furniture, and very tan bottom have made them impossible to view. Luckily, this particular boy – who I’ve now seen twice – has the potential to be a long-term playmate…so I will make sure to capture his next spanking properly.

*****

I like being with creative and thoughtful people. Having the opportunity to make the acquaintance of such a diverse group of people is one of the things that I most enjoy about this career(life). I held the first spanking story contest in hopes of getting to know more about the interests and experiences of my fellow spankos…and of giving a spanking, of course. With those goals accomplished (E will receive his ‘prize’ this week – stay tuned), I also was very pleasantly surprised with the creativity and care that the contest inspired.
May’s contest will reflect the certainty that I now have in the ability of my fellow spankos to tickle one another’s fancies (and mine) through creative sharing. I look forward to giving many ‘prizes’ to deserving contest winners in the future. New contest starts May 1.

*****
The computer crisis has ended, gratefully.

– Dana
Visit my premium video, DVD, and products website at DanaKaneSpanks.com.